Remember that feeling from school? You’re at a massive, noisy party. Everyone seems to be in their own little groups, laughing, connecting, and having a blast. You’re stuck by the punch bowl, unsure how to break in. You try to shout over the music to get someone’s attention. It’s exhausting, awkward, and leaves you feeling invisible.
That’s what building an online presence feels like for most people today. We’re told we have to be on social media. We have to post, to network, to “build our brand.” So we join the noise. We shout into the void of LinkedIn with stiff, corporate jargon. We post perfect, lonely photos on Instagram. We chase viral trends on Twitter (or X). And we wait. And usually, nothing happens except a vague sense of burnout.
What if I told you there’s a better way? A way that doesn’t involve shouting, but instead, involves lighting a campfire.
Imagine for a second you’re in a forest at dusk. You gather some wood, strike a match, and light a small, welcoming fire. You don’t have to scream into the dark, “HEY! OVER HERE! I HAVE A FIRE!” You just tend to it. The light flickers against the trees. The smell of woodsmoke drifts on the breeze. The warmth radiates out. One by one, people notice. They’re drawn to the light, the warmth, the promise of connection. They come and sit. They start to share their own stories. Opportunities—conversations, ideas, collaborations—begin to spark naturally from that shared space.
This is what a true, attractive online presence is: not a megaphone, but a campfire. It’s a focused, value-giving, authentic space that draws people in because it offers them something—light, warmth, insight, community. And when you have that, opportunities don’t need to be chased. They find you.
This isn’t about becoming an “influencer” with millions of followers. This is about building a digital home that resonates so clearly with who you are and what you know that the right people—clients, employers, collaborators, friends—can’t help but find their way to your door.
Part 1: Ditch the Billboard, Build the Garden
The old model of online presence was a billboard. It was static, shouty, and all about you: “HIRE ME!” “BUY MY STUFF!” “LOOK AT MY AWESOME LIFE!” People are blind to billboards. They’ve developed ad-blockers for their souls.
The new model—the only one that works long-term—is a garden.
Think about it. A garden:
- Requires intention and planning: You don’t just throw seeds everywhere.
- Needs consistent care: Not frantic, 24/7 effort, but regular, nurturing attention.
- Is unique to you: It reflects your taste, your choices, your hard work.
- Provides value: It offers beauty, nourishment, and a place of peace for others.
- Attracts the right “visitors”: Butterflies, bees, and appreciative neighbors, not pests and vandals.
When people stumble upon a well-tended, interesting garden, they stop. They linger. They want to know who the gardener is. They trust their expertise. They might ask for advice, or for a cutting from a plant, or to hire them to design their own garden.
Your first job is to decide: what kind of garden are you growing? An herb garden of practical tips? A wildflower meadow of creative inspiration? A productive vegetable patch of industry knowledge? You must get clear on your “plot of land.”
The One Sentence That Changes Everything:
Complete this sentence: “I help [a specific type of person] with [a specific problem or desire] through [your unique approach or skill].”
For example:
- “I help overwhelmed new managers communicate clearly with their teams through practical, script-style guides.”
- “I help small coffee shop owners design cozy, profitable spaces using rustic and reclaimed materials.”
- “I help aspiring fantasy writers finish their first draft by breaking down complex plot structures.”
This is your garden’s signpost. It tells people exactly what to expect and who it’s for. It attracts your ideal visitors and politely informs the rest that this might not be their space—and that’s perfectly okay.
Part 2: The Three Pillars of Your Digital Campfire
Your campfire needs three things to burn bright: Fuel, Oxygen, and Heat. In digital terms, that’s Content, Engagement, and Authenticity.
Pillar 1: Fuel (Your Content)
This is the wood on your fire. It has to be good, solid stuff. No damp, rotten logs (low-effort, whiny posts). No toxic materials (controversy for clicks).
Your content should follow the 80/20 Rule of Giving:
- 80% of what you share should Educate, Entertain, or Encourage. This is pure value. It’s the “why” someone should stick around.
- Educate: Share a quick tip, a helpful resource, a lesson you learned the hard way.
- Entertain: Tell a relatable story, share a funny observation about your industry, post a behind-the-scenes blooper.
- Encourage: Celebrate a small win, affirm someone else’s work, voice support for a common struggle.
- 20% can be about your “Offer.” This is the “what’s in it for me” for you. “I have a course on this.” “My services help with this exact problem.” “My new ebook dives deeper.”
Where do you put your campfire? (Choosing Your Platform)
Don’t try to be everywhere. Be where your people are, and where you enjoy being.
- LinkedIn is the professional conference hall. Great for B2B, career growth, and industry insight. Content here leans towards articles, thoughtful posts, and professional wins.
- Instagram & TikTok are the visual art galleries and street festivals. Ideal for creators, visual artists, lifestyle brands, and anyone who can tell a story through images or short video. It’s about aesthetics and vibe.
- X (Twitter) is the fast-paced, noisy newsroom and cocktail party. Good for writers, thinkers, journalists, and those who thrive on quick, conversational sparks of insight and dialogue.
- A Blog or Newsletter (like Substack or Beehiiv) is your own personal cabin in the woods. This is your owned land. No algorithm can take it away. It’s for deep dives, long-form thoughts, and building a dedicated community. This is often the most powerful campfire of all.
Start with one main platform where you can be consistent for 3 months. Build one strong fire before you try to light others.
Pillar 2: Oxygen (Your Engagement)
A fire smothered goes out. You must provide oxygen by engaging with others. This is the biggest shift: from broadcaster to community builder.
Stop talking at people. Start talking with them.
- Respond to every comment on your posts (as long as they’re respectful). A simple “Thank you!” or “Great point!” goes miles.
- Leave meaningful comments on other people’s work. Don’t just say “Great post!” Say, “This point about X really resonated with me because I struggled with Y last week. Thank you for sharing!” Go to the gardens of people you admire and be a good visitor.
- Ask questions. End your posts with a question. Poll your audience. Run Q&A sessions. People love to share their opinions.
- Collaborate. Interview someone in your field. Co-write a post. Do a joint live stream. This introduces you to their audience and them to yours—it’s like combining two campfires into a bigger, brighter gathering.
Pillar 3: Heat (Your Authenticity)
This is the spark. This is what makes your fire uniquely yours. It’s your personality, your quirks, your real voice. People are drawn to humans, not perfectly polished logos.
Embrace the “Vulnerability Sweet Spot.”
You don’t have to share your deepest traumas. But share your journey. The struggle makes you relatable. The lesson makes you valuable.
- Share a failure and what you learned. “Launched a product feature nobody used. Here are 3 reasons why, so you can avoid my mistakes.”
- Show the messy middle. A photo of your chaotic desk mid-project. A video of you stumbling over your words before a talk. It humanizes you.
- Use your natural voice. Write and speak how you talk. Use slang if you use it. Crack the jokes you’d crack in person. Let your punctuation (or lack thereof) reflect your energy.
Part 3: The Practical Magic – Your 30-Day “Campfire” Starter Plan
This isn’t about a 5-hour daily grind. It’s about 20-30 minutes of focused, daily practice.
Week 1: The Foundation (Laying the Stones)
- Day 1: Craft your “One Sentence” statement from Part 1. Write it down. Put it where you can see it.
- Day 2: Choose your one main platform. Optimize your profile bio using your one sentence. Use a clear, friendly photo.
- Day 3-7: Listen. For 15 minutes a day, scroll your chosen platform not to post, but to observe. Find 5-10 people whose “gardens” you admire. Follow them. See how they engage. Note what kind of content you’re naturally drawn to.
Week 2-4: The Rhythm (Feeding the Fire)
- Commit to a tiny content schedule. For example: 2 value posts per week, and 15 minutes of daily engagement.
- Post 1: An “Educate” post. Share one simple tip related to your one sentence. (e.g., “One script I use to give clear feedback to my team: ‘When you did X, it resulted in Y. Next time, let’s try Z.’ Simple, clear, non-blaming.”)
- Post 2: An “Encourage” or “Entertain” post. A story of a client win (with permission), a funny meme about your industry, or a “Monday motivation” quote that actually means something to you.
- Daily Engagement (15 mins): Spend 5 minutes replying to comments on your posts. Spend 10 minutes leaving 3-5 genuine comments on the posts of people you followed in Week 1.
The Magic Shift: You are no longer shouting into a void. You are having conversations in a community you are actively helping to build.
Part 4: When Opportunities Start to Walk Out of the Woods
If you do this consistently, subtle and then not-so-subtle things will begin to happen:
- The “I’ve Been Following You” DM: Someone messages you saying they love your perspective and have a question. This is a warm lead, not a cold call.
- The “Tagged in a Post” Moment: Someone shares your work, tagging you, telling their network you’re a resource. This is social proof—the ultimate campfire invitation.
- The “We Thought of You” Offer: An opportunity lands in your lap that perfectly fits your skills, because you’ve made those skills and passions abundantly clear. “We saw your post about X and realized you’d be perfect for this project.”
- The Building of Trust: When someone finally needs what you offer, you’re not a stranger. You’re the familiar, trusted voice from their feed. They hire you, buy from you, or partner with you with incredible ease.
You are no longer a job seeker. You are a problem-solver in public.
You are no longer a freelancer begging for work. You are a visible expert attracting clients.
You are no longer an employee hoping to be noticed. You are a thought leader shaping conversations.
The Final, Essential Truth: Tend the Fire, Don’t Stare at It
The biggest mistake is to light your campfire and then sit there, staring at it, asking, “Why isn’t it bigger? Why isn’t anyone here yet?”
Turn your back on the fire and get to work. Go live your life, do your craft, learn new things. That lived experience is the wood you bring back to feed the flames. The people will come. The conversations will start. The opportunities will emerge from the treeline, drawn by the consistent, welcoming glow you’ve created.
Stop shouting. Start shining. Build your campfire, tend it with care, and watch as your whole world begins to gather in its light. Your next big thing is out there in the dark, looking for a sign of warmth. It’s time to make sure they can see yours.
